You really need to be careful when learning about parenting because some of it seems a bit harsh on the parents. Not so long ago, the main criticism was that parents didn’t give their kids enough attention. There is an impression with some highly educated people that you’re going too far with things. Over-parenting is subjective unless it’s really extreme, and that’s a bit of a problem in some ways.
The first thing we would like to look at is the tendency of parents to force their children to participate in too many extracurricular activities that go far beyond going to school. If your children play sports, or if you are simply having them learn how to paint, you can overstep your boundaries very easily. Parents may see this as a form of competition, not just something that their children are participating in. For some reason, parents really get into this, sometimes fighting with other parents, or officials, when in reality this is simply a children’s sporting event for their kids. This becomes an embarrassment, not only for the parents, but for the kids as well. Sadly, parents forget that their kids are trying to have fun, and instead, try to make themselves feel better, living their lives through their children’s victories. Children can benefit from extracurricular activities, but make sure you don’t become a fanatic about these activities for your own reasons.
If you protect your kids for too long, they can develop issues with confidence. You do want to avoid producing the mindset in your child that is not confident and low in self esteem. By the time your child is a freshman in high school, then they hopefully will have some confidence as this will really be helpful. Giving your kids the blessing of being confident is a powerful gift. Children who are over parented may also lack self esteem because they’ve never been given the opportunity to become self sufficient.
There is some real issue if your child is spending too much texting or gaming. We’ve seen news stories of kids getting kidnapped and even murdered by people they met online. There’s nothing wrong with monitoring a young child’s use of the phone and computer, but it’s also possible for parents to use these devices to constantly monitor their kids. So you now have to look at how often you keep in contact via cell phone with your kids. There are ways to watch where they go, and their iPhones or whatever they use have GPS tracking.
As you can see now, over parenting carries all kinds of effects. There’s a fine line between giving your child the guidance and protection he or she needs and overdoing it. You don’t want to under or over parent your child, and it’s difficult to find the perfect balance. Getting to that most ideal point will take time and practice, and you may have to revamp how you approach these things.