Parenting Online Teens- Advice for Parents

One mom in my group call last night who has two young teen boys said “Technology is the only thing we fight about. And we’re fighting about it all the time!” Parents of teens today are dealing with what feels like an immersion in a foreign tech-based world, and figuring out how to parent teens in this strange land feels very difficult to many.

Why is this difficult for many parents? There are many reasons… not the least of which is many of today’s parents are intimidated by technology and feeling behind the curve. It can be overwhelming to view the tsunami of tech toys one doesn’t know how to use, to deal with the incessant onslaught of information that makes you feel constantly behind, and try to promote and teach balance to a tech-addicted teen. Nothing about this is particularly easy on the surface… but when you dig down you’ll see that the basics of good parenting apply here, and a sense of overwhelm, intimidation and fear can work against you.

Anne Collier provides some of the most intelligent and balanced advice for parents. She runs NetFamilyNews.org – “Kid-tech news for parents,” insightful and smart commentary for us all. She says parents’ fear of technology, or fear of their kids’ use of it is what creates problems. “Fear is bad. Fear increases risk.” When parents are living in fear it shuts down communication… and that is when kids will go into “stealth mode” where they can be at greater risk.

Your attitude matters a lot, and I recommend you begin by becoming more informed. One of the best ways to do this is to view the 90 minute PBS special Digital Nation. It is extremely well done and worth your time. Over the next few weeks I will continue to refer to the thought-provoking commentary and share video snippits from this program in the hopes that it will inform your actions and attitudes and generate helpful discussion here.

The video below is a clip from the “Relationships” area of Digital Nation website with sensible, helpful – and non-intimidating advice for parents. One of the things that strikes me about Anne Collier’s comments in the video is her sensible and reasonable approach – the same attitude and approach that will benefit parents. She says we must apply the same good parenting principles that we apply in everyday life to our kids’ online life. We don’t just abandon our kids at the internet door.

Don’t be fearful; don’t allow yourself to be intimidated. Reframe your approach and let your curiousity and open mind guide you.
I’d love to hear your comments and thoughts.

Anne Collier video: